Uganda Closer To Passing Dangerous Anti-Homosexual Bill.

Before I get into the meat of this article, let me begin by saying that you will find my normal sense of humor and my sarcastic style of writing elsewhere.  This is not the time or the place for either - I want everyone to be aware of what is going on in Uganda right now, and I want to be blunt about it.  There is nothing funny about the Anti-Homosexual Bill being considered by the Ugandan Parliament.

Perhaps you don't know about it.  Perhaps you know it by another name.  Don't be fooled by its rather G-rated government title - there's a reason that the Anti-Homosexual Bill is also known as the "Kill the Gays" Bill.

If it passes, LGBT members of the Ugandan community will not be safe, nor will people that defend them, harbor them, or associate themselves with them. Box Turtle Bulletin has the information, complete with a bunch of lovely, educational hyperlinks:

The Anti-Homosexuality Bill would, in its current form, bring the death penalty or life imprisonment for gay people, and would endanger everyone else with lengthy prison terms for either knowing, providing services, or defending them. A complete clause-by-clause examination of the bill’s nineteen clauses begins here, and our examination of the numerous false reports that the death penalty has been removed is here. A description of the Parliamentary process is here; with the Anti-Homosexuality Bill now at step “C.” If the bill is passed by Parliament, the Uganda Constitution spells out these options before the bill becomes law.

This is very dangerous, folks.  Regardless about how you feel towards the LGBT community, I think everyone can agree that this bill is harsh, unnecessary, and terrifying.  It bears a chilling resemblance to the actions of the Third Reich during World War II, and it has to be stopped immediately.  I don't think I need to warn anyone of the dangers that innocent human beings would face if this bill passes.

Take a few minutes out of your day and educate yourself about this bill, then share that knowledge with someone.  Start a conversation, get a dialogue going.  Let the leaders of Uganda know that ignorance of this scale will not be tolerated by the rest of the world. 

Don't let them pass this bill.  Please.














I'm not sure how old this is, but here's the link to a Change.org petition you could sign to show your support for the Ugandan LGBT community.  Out of date or not, your signature can't hurt.


Peace.Love.Understanding.

Has Romney Disqualified Himself From Running For President?

Is Romney ineligible to become the next President of the United States of America?  It's a very real possibility, especially since he threw a few fundraisers during his disastrous little overseas meet n' greet a few weeks ago.  These fundraisers were extremely private, with no journalists present (with the exception of one who did not have access to the donors), no filming or photography allowed, no diligence done, and no donor ID's checked.  If money changed hands at these rich shin-digs (which I'm sure they did, you know... being FUND RAISERS and all), Romney could be in a lot of trouble. 

But why?  Let's ask the Supreme Court and their 9-0 decision that they threw down in Bluman v. Federal Election Commission:

(a) Prohibition

 

It shall be unlawful for —

(1) a foreign national, directly or indirectly, to make —

(A) a contribution or donation of money or other thing of value, or to make an express or implied promise to make a contribution or donation, in connection with a Federal, State, or local election;

(B) a contribution or donation to a committee of a political party; or

(C) an expenditure, independent expenditure, or disbursement for an electioneering communication (within the meaning of section 434(f)(3) of this title); or

(2) a person to solicit, accept, or receive a contribution or donation described in subparagraph 

(A) or (B) of paragraph (1) from a foreign national.

 

2 U.S.C. § 441e(a).[fn2] The statute continues to define "foreign national" to include all foreign citizens except those who have been admitted as lawful permanent residents. Id. § 441e(b). 

Huh.  Very interesting, Supreme Court, thank you.  

 

Romney, already having to evade the demands of the American people to see his tax returns, will now have to prove that he hasn't accepted foreign money to fund his campaign.  Considering no records were apparently kept, that could prove difficult.  If he has taken foreign money, then he is 100% ineligible for the Commander-in-Chief position, but very eligible for a cozy jail cell in some white-collar prison.

As Veterans Today points out:

"If you go outside the US, if you stay inside the US, if your contributor is living in the US but not a citizen, any money you get can mean years in jail.

"Romney went the whole way, personally campaigning outside the US, soliciting foreign citizens, and humiliating himself and his country with his ignorance and flagrant attempts to trade illegal cash for promises of illegal war.  One could hardly break more laws if one wanted.

"Romney has raised millions in foreign cash at fundraising event across Israel and London, those that we know of so far.  One table alone gave him a million in cash.  None was from American citizens.  Fewer than 10% of Romney’s contributors in Israel are estimated to be “dual citizens.” Others may have just flown the money in."

So what do you think?  Is Romney in trouble?  Or will he bury this just like he did his tax returns?  

 

Woman Sues Kid Over Little League Accident.

Have you ever been called a mean name by a kid?  Have you ever been physically injured by a child who truly meant you no harm?  What was your first reaction?  If you're like me, you'll be a man about it and challenge the little punk to a schoolyard fight (3:00 - by the big slide).

If you're an idiot, you'll get a lawyer and file a lawsuit because this is America goddamn it.

Salvation Army Major Believes Homosexuals Should Be Put To Death.

Major Andrew Craibe, the Territorial Media Relations Director for 

the Southern Territory in Victoria for the Salvation Army

Australian LGBT journalists Serena Ryan and Pete Dillon recently had an interview with Major Andrew Craibe of the Salvation Army, and holy fuck did they get more than they bargained for.  In a span of approximately fifteen minutes, Ryan and Dillon showed me what true journalism was and, furthermore, proved that our system of reporting is a piss-poor sham.  People should be held accountable for their actions, words, and beliefs, not let off the hook because they know how to circumvent a question.

Don't believe me?  Listen to the full interview by clicking on the link below, and then try to defend the journalists of America.

Interview With Andrew Craibe. 

Joe Williams Is Falsely Accused Of Making Racist Comments.

Pictured above is Joe Williams, the White House Correspondent for Politico that recently came under fire by the right-wing reality spin known as Breitbart.com for a comment he made on MSNBC's Martin Bashir Live.  First of all, let's look at the comment that started the shitstorm:

"It’s very interesting that he does so many appearances on Fox & Friends. And it’s unscripted. It’s the only time they let Mitt off the leash, so to speak. But it also points out a larger problem he’s got to solve if he wants to be successful come this fall: Romney is very, very comfortable, it seems, with people who are like him. That’s one of the reasons why he seems so stiff and awkward in some town hall settings, why he can’t relate to people other than that. But when he comes on Fox & Friends, they’re like him. They’re white folks who are very much relaxed in their own company."   

Scott Walker Wins And I Lose Faith In This Country.

This idiot re-won the governor seat in an unconventional Wisconsin election tonight, proving that if you've got money and friends in the right places (with money!), you can pretty much buy democracy. 

Side note: I have absolutely given up on this fucking country.  This is heart-wrenching. 

With Scott Walker winning again, despite the horrible way in which he has run his state in the last couple of years, it's actually possible that Mitt Romney could win the presidency.  I'm not saying that Wisconsin has that much pull in the election come November.  I'm merely stating that Americans are as ignorant and as unintelligent as the rest of the world thinks we are.  Fact. 

With this win for Walker, we have proven to the world that we can be bought, and that we are dumb enough to believe blatant lies in the face of facts.  We are a blemish on this planet, and a war in which the rest of the world unites against us cannot possibly come soon enough.

I pledge to you all that if Romney wins this November, I will pack up and move overseas so long as I have the financial means to do it.  I don't care where.  For an added bonus, I will document that journey with actual photographs of me moving my shit out of my apartment here in Maine.

And it will culminate in me renouncing my citizenship of this backward moving, homophobic, misogynistic, plutocratic, theocratic mass of land that embarrassingly calls itself "The Land of the Free."    

Now I know what some of you (white older males) are thinking: "Good!  Get out of here, you unpatriotic son-of-a-bitch!"  And that's totally fine.  Because I don't want to be here when the rest of the world realizes we are still breeding, watering down the collective gene pool with racists, bigots, and all-around assholes.   

Jonah Goldberg Takes The Oddly Unpopular Stance Of Beating Young Adults.

Jonah Goldberg, pictured above, is a writer for the National Review as well as the author of "Liberal Facism."  I don't know if anyone remembers, but he was on "The Daily Show" on 1/16/08 to promote said book.  Jon Stewart promptly tore him a new asshole.  I remember the day quite fondly, because it was when I personally fell in love with Stewart's ability to crush subhuman amoebas like Goldberg in any debate.

More to the point, it's now four years later, and I had completely forgotten about him.  Imagine my surprise when I see his face on ThinkProgress, attached to this headline: "National Review Writer: Conservatives Should 'Beat' Young People Who 'Think Socialism Is Better Than Capitalism'." 

Smoking Out Fraudulent Voters In Florida.

Pictured above is Rick Scott, the Republican Governor of Florida.  While he looks as though he has just been plucked and boiled, I assure you that he's just naturally unnatural.

His brain, however, I can't vouch for.  As many of you have heard, Scott has been moving forward with a plan to purge people from the voting rolls - people that, he believes, do not have the right to vote.  The list of names is astronomically flawed, as you can imagine.  It's no coincidence that most of the list consists of Hispanic Americans and people that frequently vote Democrat.

In a not-so-subtle way, Scott is trying to give Florida to Mitt Romney before the November election.

North Carolina Has Officially Become A Haven For Hatred.

Well, North Carolina, I suppose you asked for it.  By passing Amendment One a few weeks ago, you made it quite clear that you are a haven for hatred, bigotry, and idiocy.  Enter the KKK.

Birthers: Natural Born Dumbasses.

It's really no surprise to me that the Birther movement is alive and well in the state of Arizona.  This is the same state, remember, that passes illegal and racist laws on a regular basis and, most surprisingly, has a law on the books stating that there are to be no more than two dildos per household.  You read that right.  Arizona lawmakers actually refer to their residents as "dildos."

...Anyway, the state has a lot of "Birthers" - people that don't believe that our incumbent president is a natural-born American citizen.  The other definition, of course, being:

A natural-born citizen who, by coincidence, happens to be a natural-born racist, natural-born moron, and a natural-born asshole.

Thank you, Urban Dictionary.  

Congress Speaks Like Tenth Graders.

According to the Sunlight Foundation, our representatives in Congress speak at a tenth grade level.  Here's what they have to say:

Congress now speaks at almost a full grade level lower than it did just seven years ago, with the most conservative members of Congress speaking on average at the lowest grade level, according to a new Sunlight Foundation analysis of the Congressional Record using Capitol Words.

Of course, what some might interpret as a dumbing down of Congress, others will see as more effective communications. And lawmakers of both parties still speak above the heads of the average American, who reads at between an 8^th and 9^th grade level.

Today’s Congress speaks at about a 10.6 grade level, down from 11.5 in 2005. By comparison, the U.S. Constitution is written at a 17.8 grade level, the Federalist Papers at a 17.1 grade level, and the Declaration of Independence at a 15.1 grade level. The Gettysburg Address comes in at an 11.2 grade level and Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech is at a 9.4 grade level. Most major newspapers are written at between an 11^th and 14^th grade level. (You can find more comparisons here)

Normally I'd poke fun at such a statistic, but I really can't.  See, as much as I would like for my representatives to be intelligent (and therefore speak with an air of intelligence and reason), that's far too much to ask for from a country that averages as 8th-9th grade readers. 

Maybe there IS something in our drinking water after all...

One more thing to put this whole statistic into perspective.  THESE are sophomores (10th graders) in high school:

Young, right?  Now how do you feel about our congressmen and women speaking like tenth graders?

Nightmarish Scenario: Day One Under President Romney.

I want to take a little time to specifically talk about Mitt Romney.  The very definition of a vulture capitalist, Mitt Romney doesn't appear to be as ridiculous as Santorum, Gingrich, Paul, or any of the other Republicans he beat out in the primaries.  But that's only at first glance.

Romney is just as much of an air head as the rest of them.  Many have called him the professional flip-flopper, while others have deemed him a liberal in disguise.  I have to tell ya, guys, if Romney is a liberal, than I must be some kind of radical socialist.

While his religion is off the table in terms of mocking the man himself, I want to get something quickly out of the way: I think Mormonism is one of the most ridiculous excuses for a religion that the Earth has every seen.  It's right up there with Scientology and Pastafarianism (the latter, of course, being a "mock religion").  In essence, I believe Mormonism to be a farce.  Tolerance be damned.

There are three things about Romney I want to share, and none of them are personal.  They are, in fact, policy based.  While it is six months from the election and policy can change (I honestly don't believe he'll even be elected), here is where Romney stands on the Keystone XL Pipeline, Obamacare, and the national budget.

President Obama Reveals Communist Ideals With New Slogan.

Above is President Obama's new campaign slogan.  On the surface it means that he wants to take America and the American people forward.  By and large, I think we can all agree that this is a good thing.  Nobody wants to go backward. 

But what's the subtext?  That President Obama wants to take America and the American people forward?  No, no, no.  It's far more sinister.

Thankfully we have people in this country that know the true meaning of "forward", as well as what Obama's next move as president would be if he wins the 2012 election.  Just a note for all my conservative readers:  I'm being facetious in that last sentence.  Forward means forward and little else.

Steve Doocy Proves He Is Not A Journalist (As If He Needed To).

"Fox & Friends" television personality and part-time Strutting Leo Impersonator Steve Doocy (pictured above) recently came under fire for his underhanded interpretation of something that President Obama said.  He and the rest of Roger Ailes' cronies over at Faux News have been trying to twist Obama's "silver spoon" quote for a few days now by making seem like it was an attack on Romney.  This all culminated on Thursday when none other than Mitt Romney himself was interviewed on "Fox & Friends" by Doocy.

Wondering how Romney was reacting to the latest jab from the president, Doocy brought him up to speed: "He said, uh, 'Unlike some people, I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth'."  Burn, right?  Except President Obama never said, "Unlike some people."  In fact, he wasn't even talking about Mitt Romney.  He was talking about education beyond high school.

What he said was: "We created a foundation for those of us to prosper.  Somebody gave me an education.  I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth.  Michele wasn't.  But somebody gave us a chance."

The Attack On Woman's Rights.

With each day that passes, there's a new headline announcing how yet another state has pushed to repeal some form of a woman's rights.  It's too bad, then, that our disgustingly lazy media would rather report on how large Kim Kardashian's ass has gotten, or the ongoing feud between Hillary Rosen and Ann Romney (which is a pointless argument - both are kind of wrong).

Let's start from the top.  Democrats and liberals, noticing that Republicans and conservatives have become more and more focused on passing legislation that involves only women, began to claim that the GOP was trying to start a war on women.  Republicans and their media arm, Fox News, shot back with the ever-so-adult, "Nah-uh!  You are!"  

Now, to say that this is a "war" is both ridiculous and sensationalist.  It isn't a war.  That's insulting for two reasons: 1) It trivializes actual war (like the one in Afganistan) and 2) It makes it sound like legislators are reaching for their weapons and firing at women.  The proper term, I think, is "attack."  Politicians are attacking the same rights that women have been working towards for the last one-hundred plus years.

Paula Smith Ignorantly Defends Her Derogatory Bumper Sticker.

The above bumper sticker (which might as well say "Please fuck up my expensive automobile") is being sold by Paula Smith at Stickatude.com.  Smith defended the language that the sticker uses in a recent interview with Forbes, going so far as to say that the vile, racial epithet "nigger" isn't offensive.  Her reasoning is two-fold.

1.) "According to the dictionary, 'nigger' does not mean black.  It means low down, lazy, sorry, low down person.  That's what the N word means."

2.) It's not a bad word, "Because I don't use it.  I have kids here around me that are black kids.  I call them my own kids.  I've helped black families... to guide them in the right direction.  Paintball is one of these things.  We like to laugh and have a good time.  That's our way of life."

Floridian Man Kills High Schooler And Gets Away With It.

From AddictingInfo.org:

On February 26, a kid named Trayvon Martin was visiting his dad in Sanford, FL, just outside Orlando. So he and his dad are watching the NBA All-Star game and at halftime, his little brother wants some candy. Trayvon heads out to the convenience store and picks up some Skittles and an iced tea. He’s a junior in high school in Miami who wants to be an aviation mechanic.

As he’s walking home, a car starts following him. The man driving the car is watching him. Trayvon finally turns and says, “What’s your problem?” The problem is he “walks in a suspicious way” – and the guy in the car is a [28] year old neighborhood watch captain who has been stalking him from the convenience store. When Trayvon confronts him, the man gets out of his vehicle and they get into some kind of shoving match. The shoving match ends with the unarmed teenager dead on the ground within sight of his dad’s front yard.

This being 2012, one should know just how this story ends: the police show up and arrest the neighborhood watch captain for gunning down an unarmed seventeen-year old young man.  But this is 2012 in America, and that is most certainly not how this story ends. 

Lou Dobbs Vs. "The Lorax."

I am going to get straight to the point on this one.  Rarely do I get this angry - this pissed the fuck off - about things I find during my daily web-surfing.

Lou Dobbs, pictured above, is claiming that Universal's new movie - an adaptation of the Dr. Seuss classic, "The Lorax" - has an insidious goal: to indoctrinate our children.

"It's about a woodland creature who speaks for the trees and fights rampant industrialism... So where have we all heard this before?  Occupy Wall Street, forever trying to pit the makers against the takers, and President Obama repeating that everyone should pay their fair share in dozens of speeches since his State of the Union address last month... The president's liberal friends in Hollywood targeting a younger demographic using animated movies to sell their 'agenda' to children."   

I did not make that bold text up.  Those are actual words out of Lou Dobbs' actual stupid mouth.

Don't believe me?  I've posted the entire clip at the bottom of this page.  

Santorum Is On Everyone's Lips These Days.

Oh, boy, does Santorum know how to get a crowd of the Righteous Right going or what?  All it takes is one good glance at any major news network's home page to know that my buddy Rick Santorum is going places.  What places, you ask?  White House places.

Sure, most of the stories about him are usually ones questioning his "outrageous" statements and accusations against the left.  But where the Liberals see crazy, I see smear.  How dare the Left smear Santorum when every word out his mouth is divine truth.  In 2008, for example, he said that the Democratic Party has "become the party of Woodstock" in the sense that Democratic lawmakers "prey upon our most basic primal lusts...sex."  What kind of sex?  Homosexual sex of course.

To that I say, "Duh," but the media wants to pull the reigns on the horse and slow this Santorum buggy down.  Fuck that.  Santorum stops for no one except the Lord.  So suck it, Anderson Cooper.

Money: Democracy's Kryptonite.

No, I will not explain what kryptonite is. You should

know that already.  

 

So here's the story.  Back in 2010, the Supreme Court heard a case known as Citizens United V. The Federal Electoral Commission.  Citizens United is a conservative group that wanted to air a movie about Hillary Clinton that they had creatively titled Hillary: The Movie.  The strange part of all this was that they wanted to air it back in 2008 - the appeal didn't reach SCOTUS for about a year and a half.

It's really all convoluted.  The history of the case is so twisted and ridiculous, I'm surprised that the higher courts are able to remember what it is they are voting on.  I kid you not, SCOTUS benched the case in August of '08, heard oral arguments in March of '09, and then issued an order in June of '09 for the parties to reargue their cases in September of '09.  The vote, by the way, wasn't made until January of 2010.