Invasion of the Body Scanners.

I hope she made sure the safety was turned on before she stuck that
piece down her ass crack...

Unless you've been living under a rock, I'm sure you all know about the new body scanners being implemented at the major U.S. airports.  The above image is a test image from the Transportation Security Administration, demonstrating what the body scanner is capable of seeing.  The following image is what the scanner looks like from the outside.

I know, right?  It looks harmless enough.  Like a magician is doing a trick or something. 

Unfortunately, it's not harmless.  It's degrading, extremely unnecessary, and- oh, yeah- it shoots radiation at your genitals.  The TSA defends the radiation by saying, "Oh, well, it's not that much radiation!"  I'm sorry, guy looking at my junk from a computer several feet away, but any amount of radiation is too much for me.  I just want to get on a plane, not turn green and start breaking shit because of your stupid body scanning experiment.

My issue with the body scanner, aside from the obvious invasion of privacy, is that it seems excessive.  I mean, how many people have successfully hijacked/blown up an airplane?  Just a handful, right?  And no, I'm not being insensitive about it, and no, I'm not saying that what happened nine years ago wasn't a complete disaster.  I'm just saying that this doesn't happen regularly, and that the additional security was working.  

You might be wondering, "But what about the Christmas Bomber last year?"  Okay, yeah.  But did he complete his glorious mission?  No.  He botched it because, I guess, mixing two chemicals in your underwear is a difficult task to accomplish.  What is hilarious to me is that al Qaeda claimed responsibility and called it revenge.  Revenge.  Let me put that in perspective for everyone.  Al Qaeda believes that it was victorious in exacting revenge on the U.S. by putting a 22 year-old on an airplane with chemicals in his underwear.  Wow.  I broke into a sweat just typing that, I was so terrified.  

Hey, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab.  First of all, change your goddamn name.  Secondly, I have a book for you to read.

Anyway, back to the body scanners.  There are alternate routes you can take when getting screened at the airport, but the body scanners have become the primary method.  I think this article from CNN, along with the accompanying video, is well worth the visit over there.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/TRAVEL/11/12/travel.screening/index.html

I particularly like the part in the video where the TSA practically admits that it really doesn't do the job that it's intended to do.  Way to go, guys.