Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Working People Vote Republican? Sure.

I saw this ignorant piece of shit bumper sticker on the back of what I can only assume was an ignorant piece of shit person's truck (where else?) earlier this afternoon.  Had he looked into his rear view mirror, the driver would have seen me flailing about behind my steering wheel, flipping him the bird and screaming not-so-pleasant language at my windshield.

That's the point of his bumper sticker, after all.  It's not to proclaim something he's proud of  (else it would just say, "I vote Republican") - it is to purely insult people who don't lean to the right or vote Republican.

Essentially, this man has stated that the work I do doesn't count as work, as I am a lazy, good for nothing, liberal.  His work, however, is true American work.  Never mind the fact that I am going to college for a degree in human rights law, no.  He contributes more to society because he votes Republican, and Republicans contribute more to society because fuck you, that's why.

I don't buy this.  While my current job requires me to work part-time in a grocery store deli, I still believe that the work I do is actual work.  I get paid for it, and I pay a higher percentage of taxes than most high-income Republicans do.  I guess, by that logic, I'm contributing more to society than most Republicans. 

Most of the people in this country do, in fact, work.  Only a very small percentage are unemployed by choice.  So if all working people voted Republican, methinks that the elections last year would have gone a lot differently.  We should change this bumper sticker, huh?

Let's see... what would be more appropriate?

Well, I know that, on average, people that lean politically to the left have a higher IQ than those that lead to the right.  So it could say, "Dumb People Vote Republican."

IQ is also directly tied to religious affiliation.  Those without religion are generally more intelligent than those who follow one.  So it could say, "Religious zealots vote Republican."

And I guess if we're taking a small percentage of the population (those that don't work) and applying that to a larger whole (liberals), then it's only fair that I get to do it too.  For example, not all Republicans are racist, but most racists are Republicans.  I could say, "White supremacists vote Republican."

One last one.  Most people that watch Fox News lean to the right.  Fox News is known for its right-wing bias (so much so that it's not only common knowledge, but a huge joke as well), as well as its ability to dumb down information, twist it, and basically lie. 

From Daily Kos: "The allegation that Fox News exploits their audience's tendency to voraciously consume absurdly spun tales driven by fear has been documented by researchers at the University College London Institute of Cognitive Neuroscience (and yes, that's real). Conservatives regularly demonstrate their proclivity for barking at the outrageous falsehoods proffered by Fox and other conservative fabulists. Among the university's findings were that the brains of conservatives are more likely to have an enlarged amygdala which is associated with greater inflexibility, emotion, and fear response."

So another bumper sticker could read, "People with enlarged amygdala vote Republican."

The bumper stickers I came up with were just as insulting - if not more so - than the first one pictured above.  "But Shaun," you might say, "You're a liberal.  Aren't you supposed to stand for peace?" Of course.  I'll be posting something about this later, but there comes a point when you just have to tell people to shut the fuck up and stop being so goddamn ignorant, liberal or not.

I'm gonna wrap this up by changing gears.  Were I the man driving this truck, I'd be ripping that sticker off out of plain embarrassment.  Under our current GOP governor, Paul LePage (who was elected with only 39% of the vote), Maine has become the least attractive state in the union for business with a dying economy.

So congratulations, Republicans.  It's hard to do work in a state where there is none.  Who are you going to vote for now? 

Who am I kidding?  You're going to keep voting Republican, even if Democrats are better with money.

For IQ stats cited above, click here. 

If you're a Republican that takes issue with this article, click here.    


Gra*ma Banana said...

Let me get this straight...FOX News watching right wing nuts, bigoted white supremacists, religious zealots with lower IQs, Vote Republican. Now that might just make the best bumper 'snicker' ever!

Melissa said...

Apparently they're giving them away for free here: I plan on altering mine as soon as it arrives. Then again, it may never arrive, seeing as I included a comment about the follies of trying to rally support by baselessly insulting everyone who doesn't already strongly agree with you. (See Romney insult 47% of the country, see Romney lose by a laughable landslide.) Then again, what would I know about business, I'm just some liberal halfway through a Master's degree in it.

A Sane Break said...

If this were Facebook, I'd like the shit out of your comment, Melissa.